10 Months Later...

Ten months after the first day of med school... and I feel as if there's nothing much to show for it. And I'm in the Top 5 in our batch in the last Block so I hate to think how the others are faring.

Seriously... I'm not bragging or anything. It's just that I know good grades doesn't make you a good doctor. The only reason I'm hanging in the Top 5 seems to be because of my amazing psychic skills when it comes to answering multiple choice questions. That's where they get the bulk of our grades.

But when you're in the hospital, you don't get multiple choice questions. And the thing is, there are few things more dangerous than an ignorant doctor.

So I have every reason to be moderately anxious when upon self-evaluation, I realized how little I know. And I'm not even exaggerating. I wish I were. It feels a bit overwhelming... the huge amount of information I don't know and am supposed to know, I mean.

So this Christmas break, I will seriously try to read more... read in advance even. And by summer break, I plan to go over everything. It's quite a task, even without my tendency towards procrastination.

But if I get through this, I will thank myself later.

Hmmm

There's a serious glitch in my blog settings. My "View Blog" button gives me a view of what my blog was before I made some changes and started paying attention to it.

It's annoying. I'm wondering if disuse had something to do with it. It's like it's permanently frozen to whatever state I had left it in.

I don't want to have to start all over again. It's a hassle. I have too many blogs as it is.

Tidbits

One of my New Year resolutions would be to start seriously blogging. Not that I have readers. I write mostly for myself. It's therapeutic. Plus, it's an outlet for my overly-active, overly-wild, creative mind. Hey, if I didn't feel the calling of medicine too strongly, I'd be a novelist by now. (I wish.)

So I have a lot of catching up to do. A lot of things have happened since I created this blog eons ago. (How did time fly so fast?) I don't think I'd be able to write them all down. But here are a couple of tidbits. Some I'll leave like that. Others I'll elaborate later on.

1. It's Christmas Break. I hope some people are going to relax and enjoy it. Because I don't plan on doing so. (I hope I don't sound diabolical... *evil grin*)

2. Currently at Block 5, Module 2, the Respiratory System.

3. Block 4 was a bad dream.

4. The last module was a nightmare. I failed all three module quizzes. All in a row. (Ughh!) I have issues with mediocrity right now.

5. I fell two notches down in the Top 10 list in our batch. I am not happy about it. Currently at Spot Number 5. Mediocrity sucks.

6. At times, I wonder if I'm at the right school. But considering the fact that I wouldn't have met my new sort-of bestfriend and gotten extra close to a former close friend now sort-of-bestfriend, I'm glad I did. Somehow, I'll have to make up for all the handicaps I'm currently encountering.

7. Sleep is my own worst enemy.

8. I wonder if it's part of the curriculum to place medical students in really embarassing situations. Maybe it's a sort of test... You know... Along the veins of "What doesn't kill you make you stronger?"...

9. In lieu to #9, I am forever grateful to all those people who gamely allowed themselves to go through the fire of humiliation along with me. That took a lot of guts, believe me.

10. *sigh* You'd think, in a new environment, my lovelife would improve. Not a chance. It must be something genetic... like inheriting no pheromones at all. And being surrounded with a lot of good-looking to stunningly handsome medical students doesn't help at all. Oh, well. I'm moderately beautiful and intelligent. I can't have it all, right. *grin* I have to elaborate more on this later.

So that's all for now.

.xoxo.